I just want to take a moment and congratulate all the fall 2010 BKTT grads! Super congrats on your HUGE accomplishment and I hope you are enjoying life outside the bubble and getting your groove on teachin some classes.
With this graduation comes a milestone for me as well. It means my turn with teacher training is one step closer. There is spring training on the horizon, a few months after that and then my turn! A year away can feel like an eternity, even though we often say, "wow, can't believe another year has passed". Sometimes it feels as though I am just hanging out waiting for my turn. Sure, there is a lot of preparation for TT. There's saving the gargantuan amount of money needed, arrangements for when I leave, slinging shirts to make money, practicing yoga etc etc etc. But there is, what I feel like, a long time between now and my turn for training. I'm one of those people, when I've decided what I want, I want it to happen yesterday. So this waiting and planning is a good humbling lesson for me. Don't get me wrong, I fucking LOVE my life and am so intensely grateful for where I am right now. But sometimes sitting in the waiting is torturesome!!!!!!
The instant gratification stuff often causes me to future trip which can lead to some acute anxiety. I start thinking ahead of where I am at. Thoughts like: how am I going to make a living teaching full time...will I be a good yoga teacher...how do you maintain a practice while teaching. These are all things I need to think of after I have all the money saved, I'm signed up for training and I have the dialogue in my hands. All I need to focus on right now is what I can do to make teacher training happen for fall 2011. That is all I need to think about in this arena of my life and when I remind my brain and fears and social insecurities of that, I start to feel a lot better. I know teacher training is happening for fall 2011 so no need to think about post training related stuff. One step at a time here lady.
This future tripping stuff also relates to my yoga practice. Imagine that. There are certain times in the month (am I right ladies) when the self critical, judgemental negative land voices are louder than the positive ones and I start to judge my body and my practice. I start to think that I should be able to kick out my leg in standing head to knee pose simply because I have been doing this yoga for about 7 years now. Never mind that it doesn't matter if I kick out my leg cause that's just not where I am at in my practice right now. When I start putting the yoga cart before my practice horse it makes me feel bad and have some anxiety about my self image. But when I remind myself to just breathe and be who I am in this moment those fears and anxieties slowly fall away. I can see them for what they truly are, fears. Nothing to get hung up on or judge myself about. Just something to see, acknowledge and move on.
So, yes, I acknowledge that there is some time between now and BKTT fall 2011 and that is ok. I can sit with that and just be myself with who I am today!
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Friday, November 12, 2010
If you can, you must!
Bikram is often quoted as saying, "if you can, you must". This statement pretty much sums up my aspirations for going to BKTT in fall 2011. I do have a lot to offer in terms of teaching Bikram yoga and so I must go to TT in fall 2011. I can therefore I must.
There are often times when I use this statement as a counter retort to the voices that tell me to chill out and take a break when it comes time to do the postures that are particularly harder for me. Triangle and balancing stick being 2 that really get me. If I practice not listening to the negative voices and turn up the volume on the positive ones, I can find the courage to dig deep and go to the difficult. It is in the difficult where I often find myself and my deep seated strength. It also feels better for me emotionally to at least attempt the difficult rather than give up and surrender all together.
This is much like my quest in going to fall 2011 BKTT. I can therefore I must. And I must turn the positive thoughts about getting there to like volume 20. At first it was like, "Oh god, I think I want to go to teacher training". This was an internal dialogue of course, shared with the awesome boyfriend. Then it became: "(favorite teacher) what do you think about me going to TT?" After I got several "that would be awesome you would make a great teacher" from my teachers and fellow yoginis, then it was: "I want to go but I don't know how to save that much money to go". To this: "I AM GOING TO TT FALL 2011!!!!!". (so visit my etsy store and buy a shirt) This has proved to be a radical mental change for me and a solidified commitment to my goal. I now tell people things like: "I'm going to fall 2011 TT would you like to buy a shirt to help get me there". As opposed to, "I'm selling shirts to help raise money for fall TT". See the difference?... I can feel the difference. My yoga practice feels different now too. I now feel like all of my experience and what I learn through having a yoga practice is there so that I can better help my future students and learn about my lifelong career path as a Bikram yoga teacher.
Now for a little business... If you have any questions for me feel free to email me at TeachBikramorBust@yahoo.com. You can also visit my paypal donation link or, better yet, buy a shirt from my etsy store, http://www.etsy.com/shop/TeachBikramorBust. They make excellent holiday gifts for those fellow yogis and yoginis in your life! All the proceeds go towards my fall 2011 BKTT funds.
There are often times when I use this statement as a counter retort to the voices that tell me to chill out and take a break when it comes time to do the postures that are particularly harder for me. Triangle and balancing stick being 2 that really get me. If I practice not listening to the negative voices and turn up the volume on the positive ones, I can find the courage to dig deep and go to the difficult. It is in the difficult where I often find myself and my deep seated strength. It also feels better for me emotionally to at least attempt the difficult rather than give up and surrender all together.
This is much like my quest in going to fall 2011 BKTT. I can therefore I must. And I must turn the positive thoughts about getting there to like volume 20. At first it was like, "Oh god, I think I want to go to teacher training". This was an internal dialogue of course, shared with the awesome boyfriend. Then it became: "(favorite teacher) what do you think about me going to TT?" After I got several "that would be awesome you would make a great teacher" from my teachers and fellow yoginis, then it was: "I want to go but I don't know how to save that much money to go". To this: "I AM GOING TO TT FALL 2011!!!!!". (so visit my etsy store and buy a shirt) This has proved to be a radical mental change for me and a solidified commitment to my goal. I now tell people things like: "I'm going to fall 2011 TT would you like to buy a shirt to help get me there". As opposed to, "I'm selling shirts to help raise money for fall TT". See the difference?... I can feel the difference. My yoga practice feels different now too. I now feel like all of my experience and what I learn through having a yoga practice is there so that I can better help my future students and learn about my lifelong career path as a Bikram yoga teacher.
Now for a little business... If you have any questions for me feel free to email me at TeachBikramorBust@yahoo.com. You can also visit my paypal donation link or, better yet, buy a shirt from my etsy store, http://www.etsy.com/shop/TeachBikramorBust. They make excellent holiday gifts for those fellow yogis and yoginis in your life! All the proceeds go towards my fall 2011 BKTT funds.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
In full effect!
Hello ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls.... Today is the day you all have been waiting for..... Let me be the first to present to you, my very own, one of a kind TeachBikramorBust etsy store!!!!!!
That's right. I finally have my etsy store open for shirt buying business. For those who don't know, etsy.com is like an artists amazon.com. It's a really cool site where artist can sell their goods. To open an account is really really easy and FREE! You can link directly to my shop by clicking here or you can search for TeachBikramorBust in the search sellers link on etsy.com.
Some words about the shirts. The first run was more of like a test run, not in terms of quality, but in terms of what sayings people will like more. While I thought my "Sweat is Sexy" tagline was a good one, it's not nearly as popular as "Lock the Knee". hehe, go figure. I guess we Bikram people love our dialogue don't we. The first run was also to see how the women's shirts would fit. Since they re more of a "junior" cut (they are tighter fitting and have shorter sleeves with a small scoop neckline) keep in mind that they run a little on the small side when ordering. I should have more sizes available this weekend as I have a shirt order currently in the works.
For those of you who just wanna see some pics of the shirt, here you go:
Come to think of it, "Lock the Knee" is a pretty hot tagline, so maybe I'll just have to get one myself. If you have any questions at all please feel free to email me directly at gamebredlambofchrist@yahoo.com. I know, I have a long weird email but it's meaningful to me. It's a tribute to my very first little pitbull named Doe-Koo. He was that awesome people. Anyways. Go to the shop and buy some mother f*#^ing shirts and help me get my ass to training in fall 2011! Got Team!
This is my glorious friend, Kim (on the right) and her roomie Kristin who are currently at TT and current members of team Lock the Knee. For the ladies, or men getting gifts for ladies, Kim is sporting a med and Kristin a small. A shout out here for team Lock the Knee for pimpin some shirts to current TT! Thanks guys, you rock and godspeed! Only 2 more weeks to go!
That's right. I finally have my etsy store open for shirt buying business. For those who don't know, etsy.com is like an artists amazon.com. It's a really cool site where artist can sell their goods. To open an account is really really easy and FREE! You can link directly to my shop by clicking here or you can search for TeachBikramorBust in the search sellers link on etsy.com.
Some words about the shirts. The first run was more of like a test run, not in terms of quality, but in terms of what sayings people will like more. While I thought my "Sweat is Sexy" tagline was a good one, it's not nearly as popular as "Lock the Knee". hehe, go figure. I guess we Bikram people love our dialogue don't we. The first run was also to see how the women's shirts would fit. Since they re more of a "junior" cut (they are tighter fitting and have shorter sleeves with a small scoop neckline) keep in mind that they run a little on the small side when ordering. I should have more sizes available this weekend as I have a shirt order currently in the works.
For those of you who just wanna see some pics of the shirt, here you go:
Come to think of it, "Lock the Knee" is a pretty hot tagline, so maybe I'll just have to get one myself. If you have any questions at all please feel free to email me directly at gamebredlambofchrist@yahoo.com. I know, I have a long weird email but it's meaningful to me. It's a tribute to my very first little pitbull named Doe-Koo. He was that awesome people. Anyways. Go to the shop and buy some mother f*#^ing shirts and help me get my ass to training in fall 2011! Got Team!
This is my glorious friend, Kim (on the right) and her roomie Kristin who are currently at TT and current members of team Lock the Knee. For the ladies, or men getting gifts for ladies, Kim is sporting a med and Kristin a small. A shout out here for team Lock the Knee for pimpin some shirts to current TT! Thanks guys, you rock and godspeed! Only 2 more weeks to go!
Saturday, November 6, 2010
It's all about the process
"It's all about the process" is a phrase and theme I have been hearing a lot lately. I've been fortunate enough to be able to take one of my favorite teachers, Kristen, classes and she has been talking lately about "the process". It's not about the postures at all, it's about the process of them. You do the postures with the body you have THAT day THAT moment to the best of your ability that day and you recieve all the benefits from the postures. That's it that's all you have to do. Sounds simple but in practice it can be challenging for me.
And, of course!, this topic realtes to BKTT. Going to TT next fall is exhilirating, exciting and scary. I have personal worth issues which make BKTT scary to me. When I am having a challenging class, the mind goes to the scary place for me. For instance, it says, "how am I going to survive BKTT if I can't even muster the stamina to hold standing bow for the entire first set". Silly. My heart meets this quandry with the answer, "trust in the process, let go of the mind and all will be alright." Look with your eyes (and your heart) where you want to go and your body will follow, right. Right. It's not important that I don't have a killer rock star stamina practice all the time every time. My practice is not the determining factor of what will make me a good or bad teacher, my heart is. I've also heard from teachers and current trainees that TT is not the place to work on your practice and to expect your practice to greatly differ from what it is normally. What TT is about is learning all you can in the short amount of time you are there to be the best teacher you can be when you leave training. I expect to be learning what it means to teach a good Bikram class my entire career. It's important I remember that I am doing all I can to financially make it to TT and that I want to teach Bikram yoga for all my right reasons. Sure, it's about making it to BKTT, but it's more about the process of getting there. I am learning more and more about myself through this whole TT process than I have in a long time. It has boosted my confidence a little and focused my practice a lot. This whole "process" theme makes me think about foundation. I have heard a lot of teachers say that if you have a strong foundation then it is easier to have a strong posture. A strong foundation leads to a strong posture, much like the process leads to a strong practice.
On a different note, BIKRAM SHIRTS ARE IN THE HOUSE!!! I'm working on getting an etsy shop all set up with pictures and all that jazz. The women size shirts I ordered seem on the small side, so keep that in mind when ordering, but I do like the way they fit. Men sizes are also available! The shirts come in white with black print or black with white print. Sayings to pick from are "Bikram or Bust!", "Sweat is Sexy" or "Lock the Knee" (which seems to be a really popular request). The back has the silhoette at the top of my blog and "TeachBikramorBust.com" to help spred the word! :) They are seeling for $15/shirt or 2 for $20. To purchase right now, you can just email me at gamebredlambofchrist@yahoo.com and let me know what size, color and saying you want. I also want to thank all the people who are supportive of me going to TT. It truely keeps me going and I thank you all for that!
And, of course!, this topic realtes to BKTT. Going to TT next fall is exhilirating, exciting and scary. I have personal worth issues which make BKTT scary to me. When I am having a challenging class, the mind goes to the scary place for me. For instance, it says, "how am I going to survive BKTT if I can't even muster the stamina to hold standing bow for the entire first set". Silly. My heart meets this quandry with the answer, "trust in the process, let go of the mind and all will be alright." Look with your eyes (and your heart) where you want to go and your body will follow, right. Right. It's not important that I don't have a killer rock star stamina practice all the time every time. My practice is not the determining factor of what will make me a good or bad teacher, my heart is. I've also heard from teachers and current trainees that TT is not the place to work on your practice and to expect your practice to greatly differ from what it is normally. What TT is about is learning all you can in the short amount of time you are there to be the best teacher you can be when you leave training. I expect to be learning what it means to teach a good Bikram class my entire career. It's important I remember that I am doing all I can to financially make it to TT and that I want to teach Bikram yoga for all my right reasons. Sure, it's about making it to BKTT, but it's more about the process of getting there. I am learning more and more about myself through this whole TT process than I have in a long time. It has boosted my confidence a little and focused my practice a lot. This whole "process" theme makes me think about foundation. I have heard a lot of teachers say that if you have a strong foundation then it is easier to have a strong posture. A strong foundation leads to a strong posture, much like the process leads to a strong practice.
On a different note, BIKRAM SHIRTS ARE IN THE HOUSE!!! I'm working on getting an etsy shop all set up with pictures and all that jazz. The women size shirts I ordered seem on the small side, so keep that in mind when ordering, but I do like the way they fit. Men sizes are also available! The shirts come in white with black print or black with white print. Sayings to pick from are "Bikram or Bust!", "Sweat is Sexy" or "Lock the Knee" (which seems to be a really popular request). The back has the silhoette at the top of my blog and "TeachBikramorBust.com" to help spred the word! :) They are seeling for $15/shirt or 2 for $20. To purchase right now, you can just email me at gamebredlambofchrist@yahoo.com and let me know what size, color and saying you want. I also want to thank all the people who are supportive of me going to TT. It truely keeps me going and I thank you all for that!
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